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Friday, 31 July 2009


I find there are days where I go through different emotions... randomly!! In the morning I'm irritable, the afternoon I'm happy, evening... doubtful! And thats how I felt today... doubtful!

Doubting my path, my future, my progress... but I feel that sometimes this doubt is imminent after I've spoken to someone... especially someone my age who seems to be doing far better than I am! It doesn't matter how happy I can be but that doubt always seems to creep in... *shakes head* ... but as doubtful as I may be at that time... I am confident in the fact that God has my back and I will be just fine!

I feel like ever since I was young I've been living for other people, I've always been into diverse music, I've always had a different fashion sense... I've always been called 'neeky'... and when you're young you try so hard to fit in... you just want to be a part of something but as I grew older, I realised that I am the way I am because God made me this way... and He didnt make a mistake, so if I like different music... that is my business, that is my taste... not everybody on this Earth will like the same thing, yet I feel like we put so much pressure on ourselves to conform to whatever we feel is acceptable.

I've embraced my uniqueness... and I find it funny that things I've liked that have been mocked are now being accepted because its 'fashionable'... Stay true to yourselves people... and don't doubt the way you've been created, don't doubt yourself, don't doubt your abilities...

I didn't mean for this post to come out like this, lol! Be inspired!

I've listened to this song countless times but seemed to miss this blog's motto in Lauren's verse 'I must confess, my destiny's manifest'...

'Manifest Destiny '09'!! The desires of your heart will be manifested in your future as long as you believe that it is possible and within reach, maybe not now... but most certainly in your future!!

- Gabrielle

Monday, 13 July 2009

I Apologise!!

Its been too long... and I apologise... how could I lhave left my readers alone for so long?! Please forgive me! Lol!!

I've been away for a while now... partly due to volunteering abroad for three months (that experience was amazing... there will be more stories on that) and returning back to London living (quite difficult)... so difficult that I have been exploring ways in which I can make a living abroad. Until that plan comes to completion... I will be here more frequently updating you on the folly!! Lol!

Before I left London... I was the subject of harsh words and drama... its something I don't ever ever ever want to have to encounter again in life! Not only because I'm not 'that girl' but because I realised that some people will never like you (for no reason at all) and if ever there comes a time where they can express that dislike... they will do it in the harshest way possible!! I hope I'm making sense!!

Disguising their hatred for you amidst a complicated situation... ok enough of the codes, let me be direct 'cos I'm not sure if you'll understand where I'm going with it... e.g imagine knowing someone who you were cool with but when a situation arises they become so cold and callous... talking about you... sending indirect messages etc, my thing is that they never liked you, for so much hate to come out of a small situation... so basically this is what happened before I left and even though I was unhappy that I had to leave at that time... there could not have been a better time to do so! I believe that was God... (no detail needed on how I was gonna handle that situation had I not left... alrite then!)

*exhales*... I've been back for a month now and all I can say is... establish your good friends as soon as possible... acquaintances really do not matter!! I've come across so many different reactions of 'so-called friends' on my return that I think I could be a millionairess on every name I mention!! Imagine waking up one morning... unsure of yourself and unsure of what you want your next step to be... then seeing a text on your phone... (I always get a lil' excited when I get a text)... opening the text and reading... 'I'm disowning you... I can't be bothered'

*blank stare* hmm okay!! If I have failed to call you... as a friend would you not call me or would you not even think 'rah I havent spoken to Gabrielle and we talk on the regular... I hope shes okay... lemme check on her' ... but NO, this dimwit sent me 'such a text'... lool... I've said it before 'I am NOT that girl'... whatever reaction he was hoping to receive is not the reaction I gave him... he's disowned me - thats his business... I asked God to get rid of unnecessary baggage and he must be part of it... lets keep it moving!!!

As I said... I hope to write more frequently!! This show will not stop... thank you for all the supportive comments/messages... I really appreciate them all... Manifest Destiny '09... its not over... there is so much more to come!! And you need to claim that for your lives also!!

Off the topic... I'm loving this song...

- Gabrielle