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Sunday 16 November 2008

'Cos This Stuff Can Only Happen To ME



It's been a month since the 'bitch, trick, ho' situation but I felt like I had to update you guys with my 1st post... just so you knew what was going on in my life! Its been very hard, I can't lie but I've just had to keep it moving (as Gabrielle so wisely suggested) but I have this feeling that the universe is trying to get me back for something... I dunno!


I've been going out, trying to get back to my old routines, keeping myself busy and Saturday was no different! I woke up extra extra early 'cos I needed to do my hair, (ladies... you know when it gets to that time... you can't run/hide anymore)... I know it gets crazy busy from as soon as the shop opens so I got there early and finished... hmmm... at a reasonable time I guess! I always hope for the best when I go hairdressers... finish in 2 hours tops... but it never goes to plan!


So, I'm done with the hairdressers, done with the food shopping, feel a bit hungry and pop into Greggs! KMT!! I dunno... am I to blame for being hungry or what?! It really is getting to me now... I pick up a sandwich and a drink... get into the queue and my heart skips a beat!


It looks like HIM from the back... but I couldnt tell... I was breathing so deeply you woulda thought I was going into labour... kmt... fucking hell man!! Just bullshit! Its only been 2 minutes in the queue but seems like much longer... I've managed to calm myself down... I mean it might not even be him! But lo and behold - it was HIM!


He just stood there looking at me... fucking wanker! Staring for a solid 5 minutes before he mustered up 'hey' (in yellow because it was a very feeble, sheepish 'hey')... kmt... I must be a dickhead 'cos this fool is really trying to be friendly... it hasn't even been that long since the incident... so why is he talking to me?! I dunno what came over me but I was so pissed off... I said a sharp 'hello' and kept it moving... he walked back up to me, grabbing my arm asking if we could talk... but at that point I had absolutely nothing to say.


I loved that guy for 3 years of my life... he loved that bitch for 3 minutes... and I must be the cordial one... I must act like the bigger person and go somewhere and talk... nah fuck that! I bought my food and walked past him... left him standing there like the prick that he is... and as much as I want to go on like 'superwoman'... I burst into tears as soon as I left the shop, i don't know what came over me! Sad, I know!


I loved him for 3 years of my life... and now nothing! They say 'love is forgiving'... not my love!

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